September 29th, 2011

Post Nasal Drip, Drip, Drip

I never imagined that i would post a journal entry on nosebleeds.  That was before September 9, 2010 when i called 911 at 3:00 a.m. because my nose had been bleeding for three hours and the drip showed no signs of stopping.  Since that time i have dialed 911 once, made 5 sets of visits to urgent care, and been treated by an ENT specialist.  I've probably had thirty or more episodes in the past year.  This morning my nose bled for two hours, and then started to bleed again just before noon.  Right now, i am breathing normally through my nose with no indication of a problem, but then that;s always the case; the bleeding starts without warning and for no apparent reason.  There are of course, reasons.
I) i have an artery in the back of my right nostril which is unusually exposed to external stimuli,
2) i live in a desert,
3) i use a CPAP, and, now, recently,
4) I have been taking warfarin (a blood thinner)

A humidifier is essential, but humidifiers are noisy, high maintenance, and costly.  Any decrease in one factor seems to involve an increase in one or both of the others.  I have ordered one recommended on which is reasonably priced (under $70) and "ultra-sonic.."  The care issue is "wait and see" but if it is truly noiseless, i will give it the care it needs.

My nose has always been large and conspicuous and evidently unusual. ( My biological mom's husband was suspicious of my claim to be her son until he saw my nose which immediately convinced him that i "was a K____.")  I really don't need it dripping blood to remind me that it is there.  And the rest of my body and spirit need to get on with living.

Adin Ballou and Hopedale Community

Among the equality and want reduction oriented "saints" mentioned by Terrance E. Cook in The Great Alternatives of Social Thought  is Adin Ballou, Universalist preacher, Practical Christian, abolitionist, pacifist, and supposed anarchist.  Trapped in Victorian and male dominated culture, he nevertheless tried to establish a community where "God's kingdom" could be brought into being on earth.  Like most attempts, this one failed, lasting only fourteen years before it went bankrupt and merged back into the larger society of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts,

If it is possible to be enthusiastic and cautious at the same time, that is my attitude toward experimental and intentional communities.  The caution arises because of the danger that any such community has of becoming a "destructive cult."
This is mostly because it is the fate of any organization that its leaders will become more interested in the survival of the organization and the continuation of their power within it than in the intended goals of the organization.  It is to the credit of Ballou and others that they allowed the community to die rather than to violate their principles to maintain it.  But we need models of good community, and each successful or failed experiment gives valuable information about how good people and good communities can come together to mutually reproduce each other.

Hopedale Community - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Albert Howard. Organic Farmer. 1873-1947

"Though he journeyed to India to teach Western agricultural techniques he found that the Indians could in fact teach him more."
Albert Howard - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The final unrecognized (by me) name on Terrance Cook's list of "saints" is that of Sir Albert Howard, agricultural administrator, botanist, teacher, and farmer.  I don't think, normally, of botany as a social science, nor do i think of farmers, qua farmers, as being social theorists.  But farming is the backbone of society.  Before agriculture the way of life of society is called "culture;" after agriculture it is called "civilization."  How food is grown structures and is structured by all other aspects of society.  A modern economy produces large scale agriculture which pushes the independent farmer into the urban workforce and destroys the rural community.  If one argues that primitive agricultural techniques are superior to modern ones, he is making a social, economic, and political statement.  He is making a statement about community and about priorities and about character, and ultimately about power.  You can't farm in "1984" the way you could in 984 where the fuel that propels the plow becomes fertilizer rather than air pollutant.

How Howard might have felt about pacifism, democracy, markets, the sermon on the mount, or colonialism is not information i am privy to.  Perhaps one of his biographers will tell me.  It is evident to me that he loved nature, that he was able to observe it closely.  Scientists and mystics are alike in that way.  He was willing to let nature be his teacher rather than try to manipulate nature to make it more "profitable."